This topic has been on my mind for sometime now. I’ve always wondered why certain relationships are one-sided. You know the type where you give give give and give but get nothing in return. Of course I’m not talking about physical giving but time, love, affection and you get nothing in return.
A few years ago I made the decision – if I give I need to be given too. Imagine being in a relationship where you are always the one to make the first move, it does become exhausting and probably makes the other person feel less loved.
I’ve always thought that in life you give what you get but I’ve learnt the hard way that it is not always like that!
Picture taken earlier today – a rainbow in our concrete jungle
I’ve actually cut out a few people from my life for that exact reason. And I’m doing that on a regular basis. Hard core but it works for me. With 2 friends I actually went through our chat history and I realised they had never ever ever ever ever sent me a message to check up on me or say hello. They only say hello if I say hello first! And yet another friend only ever says hello when she needs something. Said friend sent me a message last December and said she would come see Kanyin, it’s November and in still waiting!!! Hopefully before Baby turns 10 she will come.
View from the train on the commute to work today
Sunset on the way home yesterday
I have a big love tank but it needs to be replenished
Of course I know once in a while people have stuff going on in their lives and just need space to deal with whatever they are going through but I believe if someone is dear to you, you WILL and CAN find a few seconds to send a quick message to say hello and let a friend know you are thinking of them
Are you like me or you have a tank so full and overflowing you are ok to give give give and get nothing in return. Please tell me I am not alone. And if you are that type of friend to someone make time today to send a quick sms or email to say hello – it might just be what they need t make their day that much better
Hope you have a nice and restful weekend xxx
Hopes and Triumphs 
I agree. It’s got to be a give and take from both sides…
I really suck at starting conversations though, so if I am one of the people who made your live tank feel empty I’m really sorry.
hmmn 🙂 my policy is a little difference. I believe that in the end all my relationships sort of balance out. In some, I’m the talker and in others I’m the listener. Some I’m the giver and some I’m the taker. And in some long-term relationships, we interchange with seasons of life. No relationship is 50:50 for sure, I just try to make sure we don’t exceed 60:40 (if that makes sense)
Makes lot of sense
Yetunde’s response is so interesting! Like “what you sow you will reap” but not reap (necessarily) from the same person 🙂
First, that last photo is just glorious. Absolutely stunning, F!
Second, I love when you get real in posts like these 😉 I’m definitely not so full that I can give and give forever without reciprocation but I will retreat a bit and see if anything is forthcoming. But I don’t do clean breaks. Other people have with me, but that’s a story for another day!
I can and i’ve done clean breaks. Hard but so worth it
Thanks,for,taking the time to leave a comment on my blog about de cluttering. I agree with you on the cutting out friends thing. Lets face it if they are getting involved in the relationship ther is no relationship. I did that last year with a friend who I had known a long time and after a while I thought if I don’t ring I’ll see what happens. Well that was a year and a half ago and I don’t keep in touch and I’m okay with that. I have 4 really close good friends that I talk to and see every week and then there are next circle of reminds outside of that but my inner circle is all I need and of course family. Focus on building relationships with people that care about you. Regards Kathy A, Brisbane
That’s my take too. And thank you for stopping by
I only have a few very good friends…and they are all two sided…I don’t have energy to try and blow life into a relationship when it is only from one side.
Yep! It doesnt have to be 50/50 but reciprocity is required!
Love that last photo. You know, one can not just give and give. I am too tired to so that at the moment. In fact, I have been a rather terrible friend myself this year but next year shall improve!